ramblings of life

My oldest son is preparing for his very first deployment. I am going crazy just thinking of him leaving and being so far away for a indefinite amount of time. I know as parents we must face our kids leaving the nest and making life on their own, but this is different. I honestly don’t know how I’m going to get through this. He’s not even left yet, he’s currently training for his deployment. I just feel kind of isolated and like I am loosing a part of me. I have gone to the library and checked out some books about families dealing with deployment of their loved ones. I’m totally engrossed in the book. I’m hoping this helps somewhat. Just knowing my son will be so far away, and there will be no way I can get to him, is a bit much to deal with. I’m looking a chatroom for Mothers of sons deploying. Anyone with information on a National guard mothers chatroom, let me know please. The book I am reading is titled ” While They’re at War,The True Story of American Families on the Homefront” by: Kristin Henderson. So far the book is great, I’m looking forward to finishing it. I have a few others as well, I love reading and if anyone reading this could recommend some other books dealing with delpoyment and The National Guard I’d appreciate those as well.

I’m 40,I am the Mother of two of the finest sons ever! The oldest is soon to be 21, the youngest is 17. The oldest is in The National Guard, and preparing for his first deployment. I’m gonna be a basket case when it comes time for him to go. He really loves his job in the NG. However now he is having second thoughts. I know this is normal, and he’ll go on and do what he has to. I just wish he wasn’t going to Iraq. My youngest is a senior in high school, after school he works installing car stereo systems. He is thinking of furthering his career with a degree in this field. Whatever he wants to do,I’ll  be happy for him and proud just the same.  We as parents have to support our children with the decisions they make in life. They are the only blood children , I have. My boyfriend has three kids, and the youngest has me wrapped totally. The other two are girls, and still somewhat in denial of their Dad and Mom not being together anymore. In life we just have to roll with it. I know sometimes its easier said than done, but still we must go on. I know I can never replace their Mother, and I’m not trying to do so. I just want them to accept me. Their Dad is a good man, I have a good boyfriend . 
 Damn he makes me happier every day! I love cuddling with him and just hearing his voice. Love looking into his eyes and knowing I’m the one he loves! I enjoy going out on a boat in any kind of weather.Love to cook and have help in the kitchen.I like to ride motorcycles and four wheelers,I love fishing as long as the fish are biting.I Love to get lost in a good book, love to curl up on the couch watching a good movie with someone special.I Love having cookouts, and spending time with my family and friends.My friends are a very important part of my life. Without them,I don’t know where I’d be at times.I am becoming a bit opinated in my older age so, if you don’t want my opinion on something don’t ask, you may not like the answer.I’m just country as country can be.Nothing fancy here. Yes I have the country twang down to a “T”.Anything else just ask….